I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
