no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
