Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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