On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Randomize