better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
