i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize