Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
