i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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