but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
