YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
