no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
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