You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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