What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
