Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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