i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize