I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
