If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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