just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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