We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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