You just made me feel so damn special
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
