It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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