i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
