I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
