masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize