She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
