man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
