new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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