using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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