Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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