sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
