You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Randomize
