You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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