i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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