Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
