i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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