I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
