Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
A bitchslap is in order.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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