dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
