I don't think brook has ever known best
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
