That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Found the puke drawer
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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