woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
