Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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