Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
