Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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