I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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