why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
