ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
