how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
