i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
