The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize
