my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
